Queen of Convenience

Just when you thought I'm done with this!
So I happened to read these few other blogs and realized I don't really want to abandon this. I think the reason I don't write 99/100th of the times I get the urge is because I'm too conscious. For some mundane reason I've convinced myself that I need complete privacy while writing. That's tosh.
So it just struck me right now that I'm reading 3 books at the same time, and at snail pace. And none of them is a comic or particularly light reading.
There's the Wodehouse that I read at night. Except nowadays (nowanights?) I'm so tired by the time I get to bed, I barely read a couple of pages before snoozing.
Then there's the Agatha Christie, my first ever, that I read in the loo. Yes I read in the loo. And I personally know at least 5 other people that do the same so its hardly a big deal.
Finally there's Swathi's copy of Vernon God Little, my 2nd attempt at that. And judging by my current pace, Swathi might not get it back before 2012.
Lately I've been going book crazy. The weather's been so good, I have my own money (even if its a miniscule amount), and I've been so caught up with work that its been ages before I've had one whole peaceful day to myself. There's so many things I want to read. I hope I get around to it soon.
I dream about having a nice home in a rainy place, where I can write. If only I could get my words to flow. And my wallet too.
As much as I love them, there are a few things I simply cannot digest.
Historical Romances: I know they're supposed to be beautiful and literary and all that but they're so darn boring! And how HOW can anybody relate to characters names Marcus and Iphignia?
Philosophy without a story: Fountainhead is one of my best reads ever. But I can't read long pieces of prose with an excess of metaphors and ambiguous symbolism however well written it may be. That might be why my poetry can never be called 'poetry'. :) (see prvs entries for confirmation)
Some classics with old English: Eg. Treasure Island, Robinson Crusoe I have never completed those.
On a completely different note, bless Satkrit Krishna!
Find of the Week: Kings of Convenience - Mrs Cold

Tape of my Life

The Sony Walkman, 1979-2010
I think my generation is probably lucky or unlucky in the sense that we got to get hooked onto the widest variety of technological trends. Right from the VCR and Walkmans to CD’s and VCD’s to i-Pods and DVD’s, from Super Mario to Wii, we’ve been there, done it all.
The wonderful thing about audio tapes was that it made us listen to the whole tape, not just the tracks we thought we loved. I listened, I learnt, I loved, turned the tape to Side-B, Repeat. CD’s and i-Pods have that one evil. We’re tempted to shun a song before really giving it a chance. Ofcourse its convenient, and I don’t think I’d willingly turn back time but its still kind of sad.
My walkman got me through my 3am mornings and 1am nights in school, my first ever nights in hostel, and countless road trips to Kerala. It was through my Walkman that I fell in love with Green Day, with Coldplay, with James Blunt, with Five for fighting with A.R.Rahman. My Walkman acquainted me with Avril Lavigne, and Simple Plan and Eminem, all of whom frankly sound immature now.
In a twisted way, maybe even my radio passion might have rooted from the Walkman. Archana’s Modern Rock Album made me love John Ondrasik. My John Ondrasik craze made me request RJ Ganesh on FM Rainbow for the song. The acceptance of that first request resulted in a not-too-minor-obsession with radio shows.. and RJs.. That phase passed, thank god for that. But my love for radio didn’t, thank god for THAT. So in a very very roundabout way the Walkman made me what I am today :). I love to be dramatic, yes.
How elated I would be every time my dad let me buy an audio cassette! English CD’s cost Rs 150, no tiny amount even now. I’d be on a cassette high for a couple of weeks atleast, during which time I’d listen to the whole album again and again and again and again.. I’v never disliked a song in any of the tapes I’v owned.
It’s a logical step to terminate their production, but the implication and the realization is surprisingly emotional for me, and I suspect a lot of others.

Bollywood+Books=Chalk+Cheese ?

Chetan Bhagat. I'm not sure if I qualify as a fan. The main reason I own his books is because they're priced so conveniently. His books are a fun read. Very relate-able, very simplistic and I appreciate him for the fact that he's gotten thousands of non-readers to read.
I almost always stand up for him when my friends trash him. And I'm nonchalant when people rave about him to me. That's the kind of relationship I have with CB's books.
But one thing I have never understood about authors, and especially CB is how they can allow,watch and tolerate their books becoming demeaning ultra silly movies.
I mean i wonder that about J.K.Rowling too, but despite my deep dislike for the HP movies they're not THAT undigestable.
But CB movies. Where do i start.. It all begins with the most flawed casting you can imagine. Its like watching Brad Pitt playing Harry Potter.
Which is saying a lot. Because its not even like CB's characters are that memorable. They're nice, but there's nothing to get attached to you know.. I mean I can't even recall the names of the guys in 5 point someone though I liked the book. You feel for them when they're front of you but there's no lasting impression.
So to cast badly enough to spoil even this is saying a LOT!
Now I hear Priyanka Chopra (Tam-Bram?) and Saif Ali Khan (college-kid?) are playing the leads for 2 states- the movie.
'Nuff said.
Then there's item numbers. I mean come on. You know something's wrong if you have such less confidence in your script that you think u must add an item number to the movie (about a phone-call from God, nonetheless) to make people watch it.
And it still did not work.
I liked 3 idiots but I'm not counting that as a 5 point someone remake sorry.
I just think CB should love his books a little more.

Picnics with Yusuf..

Fridays were our Sundays. Our mums had the idea of setting up an outdoor picnic for us. We used our white plastic round table and chairs on the lawn.. There were packets of chips, and Coke and candy and all the unhealthy junk that kids swear by. It was the middle of the desert but funnily enough I don't ever remember feeling the heat in my 5 years in Al-Khobar. Me, Ujwala, Tejas, Rachna, Lakshmi and this Arab looking kid who i recall being named Yusuf used to sit around. I think we even had a beach ball to add to the picnic-iness of the atmosphere..
That was the essence of my life in Saudi Arabia.. It made me experience the best bit of being a child.. friends that doubled up as sisters. Parties, Parks, Skater-Barbie, free Tazos, chicken flavored chips, lots and lots of space..
In a lot of ways I'm really happy I didn't spend my adolescence in Saudi - infact I wonder if i would've grown up to be a completely different person if i had - but special circumstances make me wonder..what if... We would have lot more money than we do now that's obvious. I would most likely be obese. Nitin might or might not be in the picture..And I'd probably have done an engineering degree and I'd be doing my Masters somewhere in the US of A probably... quite probably I'd be doing well..might even have fooled myself into thinking that's what I want to do..
Does Everything happen for a reason? or are our lives just a chain of coincidences?

From Ribosomes to Radio..

[Image from www dot trak dot in]

Got my first pay today. Its not much at all..in fact my driver reportedly earns more. But that makes sense doesn't it? I bet he does more work than me anyway.
Anyway, its amazing how much a first pay can mean to a person irrespective of the amount. I used to see people with facebook updates that expressed the same thing and i always secretly wondered what the fuss was about. Now i realize that, at least for me, I'm hardly thinking of what to do with the money. I'm just so freakin' proud of myself. I think the main reason is cuz i can confidently say that I did it all by myself from the beginning. Of course my crazy-assed friends made me believe I could do this but for a change this is one step in my life I'v taken with no external strings attached. So thats what this cheque means to me. Freedom. Pride and Responsibility.
That and the elation that I actually lasted 1 month at a radio station.. !!

There are 2 types of people in this world......

My ENT doctor kicks ass! And that's very generous of me considering he doesn't seem to like me much. My first appointment he lectured me on how the ear isn't a dustbin to be cleaned (when i told him abt my cotton bud usage. So sue me :p ). My second appointment he was ticked off with me because I forgot my prescription (Amma's fault). During the de-waxing session he snapped at me only around 27 times. 'Please don't move', he said, except it felt more like 'Stay still Dammit!'
Yeah so i'm fairly certain I'm not his favorite patient.
So why do i thinks he kicks ass? because that blunt to-the-point rudeness is so refreshing! Its the sugarcoated folks that attract the most praise but its the mean do-gooders that actually do the difficult stuff.
I'm not ashamed to say I'm one of the sugarcoated lot. Yes. Pains me to admit it but I can't help but want to make people feel good! That makes me feel good. You see where i'm going?

Let me break it down for you. See, 2 kinds of people who do good.
1. Crowd Pleaser (Me, Peter Keating)
2. Meanie (My ENT, Howard Roark )
Me and ENT being real world examples, and Keating and Roark (Read Fountainhead) being slightly exaggarated but powerful examples.

Now ABC meets type-1 and type-2.
ABC represents the common man, of average education, average views and the behaviour of ABC in the following scenarios are at a random time when ABC is in an average mood.
In Scenario 1 and 2 ABC is going for a party wearing horizontal stripes that unbeknownst to him/her (okay who am i kidding..ABC's a girl), accentuates her unflattering flabbiness.
In Scenario 3 and 4 ABC is a persistent yet so-far-unpublished writer. In all 4 scenarios ABC asks type-1 and type-2 for their views.


Scenario 1
ABC: Hi Type-1! Do I look fat? :(
Type-1: No! I think you look hot!
ABC has a blast at the party.

Scenario 2
ABC: Hi Type-2! Does this make me look fat? :(
Type-2: Yea.. It actually does.
ABC: Oh..

My Analysis
Okay in my opinion, Type-1 did the wiser thing here. When it comes to such superficial things like clothes and looks, if a couple of white lies can make the person a more confident person then why the hell not! If ABC was wearing it in the first place, then ABC likes it, ABC just needs a self esteem boost. You dont ask someone how you look unless you think you might look good. Now all Type-2 would have done is make her self conscious and possibly ruined her night, (Don't kill me if you're feminist) just for something as inconsequential as her body structure! Lets move on to Scenario 3 and 4..

Note: In scenario 3 n 4,ABC, though a persistent writer isn't as talented as he thinks he is.

Scenario 3

ABC- I'v sent my manuscript to the 15th publishing company..
Type-1- Don't lose hope man..Keep trying and you'l breakthrough someday.


Scenario 4
ABC- I'v sent my manuscript to the 15th publishing company..
Type-2- Listen kiddo. I think its time to move on..

My Analysis
Now this is a very sensitive scenario. And in these types of life altering times is when I feel type-2 is the hero. Think about it. If ABC had Type 1's all around him he/she would possibly live his whole life in the delusion that IT will happen one day. All this time maybe ABC's actual calling is cooking! Or animation. And ABC ends up wasting a large part of his life chasing something he believes he loves.
On the other hand, type-2 might have just made an enemy in ABC, but if it is true, and the possibility of truth in what Type-2 said will linger in ABC's mind, and it might lead to ABC realizing 1 of 2 things- either type-2 is right and I have better things in store for me elsewhere, OR I love writing, enjoy writing and henceforth I would stop writing to please the publishers and type-2 and start writing just because.
I don't think I'v been my concise-est best in describing this but I'v tried my best. What I'm trying to say is, as bitter and painful as it may seem like, type-2 actually did the right thing for ABC!

So for those of you who are still reading this, I'm done with my rant now :) Most of this has been inspired by Fountainhead (ayn rand) and personal experience. I've been ABC at so many different points in my life. Its quite possible I've been Type-1 too. But i'm trying real hard to get the mental strength to be more type-2 and i know i'm getting there.
So this is dedicated to the Type 2's in my life and the Type 1's who've told me i don't look fat ;)

Would Life Have been Different?

You know how sometimes, something happens, you see something, and it makes you feel something indescribable that you just havejot down in your blog so you don't forget that feeling? Well.. This is not one of those times.



Would Life Have been Different?

If not for that X, if I was a Y,
Would I be that different, born a guy?
If the doctor’s hand shook, If I hadn’t cried,
Would I have suffocated and died?

If the last two lines somewhat despair,
I like morbidity, come on! Grow a pair.
That brings us back to the point of this poem.
But points are overrated, like Paris and Rome.

Was there a point to the Taj Mahal,
Why is water vellam and milk paal?
Okay, I know I might be wrong,
But who cares, after all life’s a song.

What I’m actually trying to say is,
Mallika Sherawat’s a snake in Hiss,
Now you’re thinking, I’m a waste of space on earth,
But hey! People said that about Colin Firth.

Though that seemed like a nice way to sign off,
My fingers are restless, they can’t hear that scoff,
Funny I should mention the auditory sense,
My ears have been feeling uncharacteristically dense.

Today’s almost over, and so is this verse,
I really don’t need to hear you curse.
This is what happens when nothing inspires,
I might as well say Austin Powers is Mike Myers.